I feel horrible.

I shouldn't keep my blog from Hay. But I am.
I dont feel right about it. I'm just not ready to have another person that I know read it. I dont even think I was ready to show Ray. I didn't know it at the time but I just feel more candid when I dont think anyone is reading.

Sometimes I just wish I had kept on using the fake name. It was easier then having to hide it from people. It sucks. It really does suck keeping it from my best friend. I wish I was brave enough to show both of them. I think part of not showing her is because of the day I talked about reading her blog. I shouldn't have said that. I was just ranting. So Hayley, if you ever do read this, I'm sorry. I didn't even mean most of it.



<3 Al